Alicia Kollmar MS, OTR/L
Next Level Mentor
alicia.kollmar@gmail.com
The first two blogs in this series focused on signing up for things we may not need, but sometimes we have the opposite problem: we can’t decide what we want. “Decision Impairment” keeps us from taking action. How do you decide when there are a lot of options or when you have to make a big decision?
Big Decisions
Is it something expensive, requires a lot of time, is a major change, or a combination of these? Should you move, should you start a business, should you sign up for that expensive coaching program? These big decisions can cause anxiety and may cause us to stay in our same, seemingly safe space because the change is so significant.
Go With Your Gut
I believe we have intuition that guides us when making big decisions. Your inner voice will tell you if it’s right for you or not. If you aren’t in the habit of listening to it then it may not be in your awareness, but it is there. Sit without distractions, imagine yourself having made the decision to go for it. Do you smile when you think about saying “yes” to it? Do you have an image of what it looks like when you are doing it? Do you like the way it looks?
Some decisions are unpleasant, such as breaking up with a significant other, having to euthanize a pet, or firing an employee, but ultimately it is the right decision to end unhappiness, painful arthritis that keeps your dog from enjoying life, or eliminating the toxic culture created by an employee who constantly complains. We have fears around big decisions, especially when it does mean a big change or a loss, but when you take notice of how you feel around those things, it makes the decision easier and clearer. Sometimes those feelings become so normal that we can’t see the big picture and how much staying where we are is truly weighing us down.
Take Data
I found myself frustrated in my long-term relationship and considered ending it. So I took data on my happiness level. It was a little tedious, but I wanted to make sure I didn’t just need an attitude adjustment or compromise before making such a big decision. Ultimately I found that I was happiest when I was home alone and the things that required compromise meant I would have compromised my values. Though it was still difficult, it helped make the right decision more clear. There are apps that can make this easier if you don’t want to write things down.
Smaller Decisions
It’s normal to be nervous when making big decisions, but small decisions can cause anxiety too.
When there are 20 Electronic Medical Records to choose from that may be a good fit, how do you decide which one you should get? Of course your budget and features are factors, but so many of those often overlap among your options.
Go Back to Your Reason for Exploring that App/Course/Etc.
Did you decide to look at it because of an advertisement? Would you have sought that out on your own? Maybe it’s not the right time to make that choice if that’s the case.
Does it have the features you were originally looking for? Go back to those, ignore the “extras” it may offer and only use those original features to help you decide.
See What Others Say
Check reviews online, ask around. See what people like and don’t like.
Does it Work With How You Think
When considering things like apps, does the interface seem intuitive to how you think? Is it easy to find what you want? For instance, some apps use icons instead of words, some use both. As someone who processes more quickly by reading than by seeing an icon or picture, I prefer to use apps that have words rather than icons for navigation. You may be the opposite.
Are You Saying “Yes” To Please Other People?
If you are a people pleaser then you may be afraid of disappointing the person who referred you for something or is trying to sell you something. Just because that sales person spent 30 minutes with you showing you the ins and outs of their wonderful product or service, and just because you like their product or service, doesn’t mean you have to buy it. It may not be a good fit right now.
For Apps: Take Advantage of the Free Trial
You can often get an inside look at things like apps and website builders by signing up for a free trial. If it doesn’t feel intuitive to you or looks like you may need to spend a lot of extra time learning how to use it, then maybe it’s not a good fit. You don’t have to stick with it.
Remember, You Can Change It Later
Most small decisions can be changed. You don’t need to stay with the first payment processor or phone service you chose.
Use Big Decision Strategies
Go with your gut or take data to see if it’s right for you.
Anxiety vs Action
Decision-making can make us nervous, and we can’t think straight when anxiety is in charge. Don’t let indecision paralyze you. Use some of this information as a guide when you have to make a decision. I’d love to know if it helped! If you need more guidance to make big decisions, coaches are great at helping you hear what your inner voice has to say. Consider getting a life coach or business coach when you have decision impairment.
